Poor Latvia

Old Latvian proverb say “Is better to have potato and lose than never have potato.”

Of course is silly. No Latvian have potato in first place.

One day Latvian man see friend drink potato juice.

“How you get potato juice? It cost much money,” he say.

Friend say “This not potato juice, is just urine.”

Latvian comedian say “What deal with potato?”

Latvian crowd not laugh.

Comedian squint into darkness, to see audience.

There is no crowd. All die from malnourish.

Latvian girl say, “I want go America one day.”

Father say, “I send you America.”

Daughter is thank father. Make tears of happy. Father use to salt potato.

Father think moment, say, “Daughter, I no send you America.”

Potato needed more salt.

One day Latvian boy say to father “Father, I have found good fortune for I have learn myself to read!”

Father say to son “How am I having such wonderful news? You will get job and make us many money to buy potato!”

Then boy die in night from cholera.

All are sad.

Latvian try to cross river. Has dog, potatoes, and dead son’s body.

Can only take two across river at one time.

If leave dog with potatoes or corpse, dog eat them. Is very sad.

Also is not good boat.

Latvian is pray for months for potato.

Next day potatoes rain from sky!

All town dead by potato to head.

Two Latvians are argue over wodka.

One say, “For wodka, I give you daughter.”

Friend say OK. Deal is struck.

But he is surprise! She deformed by malnutrition.

How many Latvian is take screw in light bulb?

Only one. Obtain light bulb is hard part. You have potato?

Latvian is rub lamp find genii.

Genii say, “What is three wishes?”

Latvian say, “I wish potato!” Then, POOF! Potato! Latvian so happy! “Oh! Is potato! Is potato!” say Latvian.

Genii ask, “What is next wish?”

Latvian is say, “I wish you go away so can enjoy potato!” POOF! Too bad.

Also, was Latvian only lamp.

Now dark.